Day 27: Al’s Excellent Adventure – Rockin’ the Mountain
Today, I actually slept in. A miracle. My legs were grateful, my knee held a moment of silence in appreciation.
We eventually emerged from the house and stumbled across four different vultures united in one glorious act: eating recently deceased animals. Nothing brings them together like l questionable animals.
Then it was off to Rock City on Lookout Mountain, home of giant boulders, enchanted gardens, and more gnomes than a garden center clearance sale.
The place is like a fantasy land built by stoners who really love landscaping.
We strolled along the Enchanted Trail, a 4,100-foot winding path filled with lush gardens, mystical stone bridges, They also had a suspension bridge that swayed more than my opinions on pineapple on pizza.
Then came Lover’s Leap, where you can allegedly see seven states at once: Tennessee, Kentucky, Virginia, South Carolina, North Carolina, Georgia, and Alabama. Personally, I saw three states and a guy named Carl arguing with his GPS. Close enough.
After surviving Rock City, we headed to the much more serious (and far less gnome-filled) Point Park, also on Lookout Mountain. It's a part of the Chickamauga and Chattanooga National Military Park, which is basically a long name for “place where a lot of people fought in the fog.”
This is where the famous “Battle Above the Clouds” happened. Union forces captured Chattanooga, opening the door for Sherman to do his “March to the Sea” thing and really ruin a lot of people’s landscaping.
The museum was small but mighty, filled with detailed maps, vintage photographs, and a massive mural by James Walker. Apparently, the guy liked drama and big skies.
Outside, there were cannons galore, historical placards, and killer views of Chattanooga, Missionary Ridge, and the Tennessee River Valley, all much better appreciated when your legs aren’t threatening mutiny.
Then it was home for a nap, because we earned it. Our pedometers tapped out and requested a transfer.
Later, we hung out with some spiritual folks, good vibes, deep talks, and ended the evening with a good Chinese dinner that didn’t try to be fancy. Just hot, tasty, and delivered fast. Amen
Bonus Entry: The Georgia-Tennessee Time Warp
Today was brought to you by the letters W, T, and H, because Welcome to Georgia! No, wait... you're in Tennessee. Actually, welcome back to Georgia! We spent the day yo-yoing across the state line like it was a jump rope contest. Every five minutes it was:
"Welcome to Georgia!"
"Now entering Tennessee!"
"Just kidding — back in Georgia!"
My Samsung watch couldn’t take it. One minute I was on Eastern Time, then boom, Central Time again. It kept flashing like it was trying to warn me of a rift in the space-time continuum. Either that, or I entered a Fitbit wormhole.
The moral of the story? If you ever want to time travel without a DeLorean, just drive near the Tennessee-Georgia border for a while. You'll arrive before you even left.
Tomorrow: Ruby Falls. Let’s hope the falls are made of water and not more stairs.
No comments:
Post a Comment