The Car Transport - Day 1

Day 1 of the Car Transport
: Mountains, Deer, and Dessert Disappointment

Today I picked up my car in Coeur d’Alene, Idaho , and let me tell you, I really missed it. Then I hit the road: Idaho, to Montana, to Casper, Wyoming. It was scenic but mostly uneventful. Mountains everywhere, and I still love them like it’s the first time.  

I even spotted a little snow clinging to some of the mountains, but nothing like the winter wonderland we saw four weeks ago. Looks like the snow packed its bags and said, “I’m outta here!”

As dusk rolled in, I tucked in behind a tractor trailer for the last 25 minutes of the drive, riding in its wind shadow like a NASCAR wannabe. On the way to my hotel, I spotted three deer on the side of the road. I am pretty sure one of them gave me the finger. I guess deer injuries travels fast amongst deer.

Somewhere in Montana, I ran straight into a hailstorm that started pinging my car like it owed the hail money. Meanwhile, I’m screaming inside, “I just got my car out of the body shop, NO MORE DENTS!” At that point, my car probably wished it had a ‘hail insurance’ policy or at least a large umbrella.

Now for the real tragedy: The Great Huckleberry Quest.

I must’ve called 20 bakeries across the region trying to find huckleberry pie. Zero success. I did find:

Two places with huckleberry ice cream.

One spot with huckleberry cheesecake.

But none of them would survive a three-day road trip in a hot car. 

I know Ray would’ve lost his mind if I’d brought back some huckleberry pie, but honestly, he’d probably throw a full-on parade if I found a way to FedEx a pie in a refrigerated crate.  It’s looking like no huckleberry pie for me or Ray. Shipping one to Tallahassee? $70. That’s not pie, that’s an investment portfolio.

At this point, I might just order a huckleberry bush online and grow my own. Pie 2030, here we come.  Mark it on your calendar Ray!

Anyway, tomorrow I’m off to Wichita, Kansas. Will I be able to get Huckleberry pie before leaving Wyoming?  Will deer continue to stalk me? Will I finally stop talking about huckleberries and mountains? Stay tuned.

The Car Transport - Day 1½

Packing for the Afterlife, One Suitcase at a Time

Nothing like a 1 a.m. fire alarm to test your reflexes and your dignity.

The alarm blares, and I’m suddenly in a high-stakes game of “What Do I Grab?” I manage a shirt, shorts, slip on my untied sneakers, and grab my phone. That’s it. No toothbrush, no regrets. I’m not auditioning for Survivor: Hotel Edition, I just want to not die in my sleep.

I head outside expecting chaos, but... nothing. Not a soul from the front desk. Had this been a real fire, most of us would've been toast, or at least slightly overdone.

People trickled ou of their rooms like it was a brunch reservation, not a potential death trap. Meanwhile, most people aren't evacuating. Oh no, they’re asking questions.

“Is this real?”

“Should we go out?”

“Do you smell smoke?”

It’s a fire alarm, not a suggestion! Get out first, hold the Q&A session later!

One family came out with all their luggage. Like… really? They saw flames and thought, “We should pack.” They looked like they’re checking out at 1 a.m. on purpose. Look, I respect the hustle, but maybe don't stop to organize your socks if the building is allegedly on fire.

Meanwhile, I’m mentally cataloging everything I left behind. My smartwatch, new $2800 hearing aid, some nice Lacoste shirts, etc . My snacks. My dignity.

The fire department shows up fast (shout out to them), but one family doesn’t even bother to come out until after the firefighters arrive. VIP late checkout energy.

There was a lady screaming something unintelligible outside, but it seemed more like performance art than panic. The firemen didn’t find anything, and just when we all settle back in, boom. The alarm again. I assume it’s the reset, or maybe the fire system is just as confused as the rest of us.

Anyway, I’m alive, and I think my granola bars are safe.

The Car Transport - Day 2

Day 2: From Peaks to Plains with a Pocket Full of Cookies

Today’s mission: Operation Huckleberry Pie.

Status: Failed.

Success: Medium-high, thanks to cookies.

Before leaving Wyoming, I launched a full-scale (mildly enthusiastic) hunt for huckleberry pie. Sadly, it was a bust. No pie to be found. But all was not los, I did manage to score some Huckleberry Iced Cookies in Cheyenne. There’s half a dozen with your name on them, Ray Tuttle . I really did try to bring back a proper pie or two... consider this a sugary consolation prize.

Aside from my failed pastry pursuit, the day was mostly uneventful.

I said goodbye to the majestic mountains and traded them for the Flattest Show on Earth, the plains. I already miss the mountains. But in a fun geographical discovery, I learned that the tallest mountain east of the Mississippi is Mount Mitchell in the Appalachians, 6,600 feet! Now that sounds like a future vacation idea. I can already picture myself eating huckleberry pie at the summit. (Let me dream.)

As for the plains:

Windmills? Check.

Oil pumps? Check.

Farms? Check.

Gas stations? Scarce.

Excitement? Not exactly.

Tonight’s stop: Wichita, Kansas.

Tomorrow: Birmingham, Alabama—because nothing says “road trip” like zigzagging through the South with cookies and dreams of mountains.

The Car Transport - Day 3

Day 3 of the Car Transport

Six States, Lots of Trucks, and Some Missing Cookies!

I started the day in Kansas, still flat, still plain, still questioning my life choices. Oklahoma kicked things off with more of the same. But then... trees appeared! Real ones! And then mountain ridges! Suddenly, I felt joy again. I swear, if I ever feel depressed, I’m just pulling out my mountain photos like emotional support animals. 😎

Once I crossed into Eastern Oklahoma and beyond, it was all green, hilly, and borderline therapeutic. Today’s route? Kansas → Oklahoma → Arkansas → Tennessee → Mississippi → Alabama. SIX states in one day. That’s either impressive or a cry for help—I’ll let you decide.

Things I Learned on Day 3:

Arkansas is where tractor trailers go to retire in the left lane. I’ve never seen so many 18-wheelers just chilling where they absolutely should not be. It felt like playing Interstate Frogger: Big Rig Edition.

The last 90 minutes of the drive involved dodging deer and tailgating a semi like it was my job. Nothing like adrenaline to keep you sharp.

I passed the Memphis Pyramid, which looked like Bass Pro Shops went to Egypt and said, “Let’s do this, but with camouflage.”

Also drove over the Tallahatchie River. Sadly, Billy Joe McAllister was a no-show. Either that, or he’s still on that bridge waiting for someone to throw something off it.

Cookie Report:

Ray Tuttle, remember those six huckleberry cookies I got you? Well… we’re now down to four. No, wait, three. Look, depending on traffic tomorrow, you might get a heartfelt story and an empty cookie bag. Just joking. Probably. 😎

Tomorrow: Home Sweet Home.

I’ll be home at least until October, because RETIREMENT IS COMING! Already plotting the next adventure... more to come! The last vacation was pretty epic and I'm not sure if I told everyone or not, but I saw a freaking bear!

The Final Leg of Car Transport - Day 4

Day 4: The Final Leg of Car Transport - The Epic (and Slightly Boring) Finale!

Today was probably the least exciting of the whole trip—kind of like the last chapter of a book you’re just ready to be over with. But, the good news? I drove from Birmingham, Alabama, through Georgia, and finally back home. There’s truly no place like home… and your own car in your own garage!

I’m officially home for a bit. At least until October, when I’ll be back on the road again. Can’t stop, won’t stop!

Much more will be filled in later!

The Grand Tour: at least 10,000 Miles, Zero Tourist Traps (Almost)

Tallahassee, FL (The Start of the Adventure!)

Distance: 838 miles

Time: 13 hours 10 minutes

Notes: The adventure begins, my friends. First stop:

Columbus, OH – Aka ‘The Pit Stop of the Midwest’

Distance: 346 miles

Time: 5 hours 17 minutes

Mood: Great, but not as great as Ohio’s famous skyline.

Niagara Falls, NY – Is This Real Life?

Distance: 9 miles (because it's that close to the falls!)

Time: 41 minutes

Activities:

Cave of the Winds: It's like a waterpark, but nature's version.

Rainbow Bridge: To cross into Canada and feel extra international.

Niagara Falls State Park: The views are almost as dramatic as my social media captions.

Canada – Eh? Time for Some Poutine!

Casa Loma (Castle Vibes): 1 mile, 7 minutes—because sometimes, you need a castle to feel majestic.

Royal Ontario Museum: 1 mile, 8 minutes. Learn stuff or pretend to be cultured.

Kensington Market: 1 mile, 3 minutes. Perfect for people watching and pretending you’re an influencer.

Art Gallery of Toronto: 1 mile, 5 minutes. Who knew 1 mile could lead to this much art?

Montreal: The Land of Poutine, History, and… More Poutine

St. Joseph’s Oratory: 4 miles, 20 minutes. A spiritual pitstop before my next snack.

Mont Royal: 2 miles, 16 minutes. Not to be confused with Mount Royal, which is only slightly more royal.

Notre-Dame Basilica: 2 minutes. But it’s worth every holy second.

Old Montreal: 5 miles, 17 minutes. Walk through cobblestone streets, pretending it’s the 1700s.

Quebec City – Like a Mini Paris, but Cooler

Fairmont Le Château Frontenac: 2 minutes. Because luxury is just a walk away!

Musée du Fort: 17 minutes of intense history… and an overwhelming urge to pretend you’re a Canadian soldier.

Montmorency Falls: 14 minutes, 7 miles. It’s like Niagara Falls, but with fewer tourists and more majestic vibes.

The Home Stretch: Time to Say Goodbye to the Road

Maine (aka “The Lobster Land”): 2 hours 44 minutes. Eat lobsters or regret it.

Cadillac Mountain (Bar Harbor, ME): 6 hours 58 minutes. Yep, it’s as fancy as it sounds.

Cape Cod National Seashore: 4 hours 9 minutes. Sand, sea, and… sand again.

Nantucket: 5 hours 6 minutes. No, I’m not rich. I just like the name.

Martha’s Vineyard Museum: 2 hours 29 minutes. Pretend to be fancy, then Google what “museum” means.

Long Branch, NJ – Beach Vibes or Just More Traffic?

Distance: 51 miles

Fun Fact: You’re in New Jersey now, so keep your eyes peeled for either oceanfront views or the classic New Jersey "scenic traffic jams."

Manahawkin, NJ – Home Sweet… Wait, Where’s the Beach?

Distance: A mere hop, skip, and jump away (well, about 51 miles)

Time: Depending on your luck, 59 minutes of pure bliss… or more traffic

Ending thoughts: Could’ve been worse. Could’ve been more traffic. But also, hot dogs.

So There You Have It, Folks – A Car Trip, a Lifetime of Memories, and Approximately 8,000 Bathroom Stops Later...

Al and Ray's Excellent Adventure: The Highlights Reel #1

Highlight Reel 1:

Al & Ray’s Excellent Adventure: 

We kicked things off on June 19th, starting our Excellent Adventure like any great buddy movie—with snacks, stories, and some truly questionable navigation.

First stop: Ringgold, Georgia, where we met up with our good friends Phillip and Kim. We hung out at their place, caught up, and then hit up a seafood restaurant that made us question why we don’t live next to an ocean full-time.

Then it was off to Nashville—home of country music, cowboy boots, and parks with very specific names.

We visited the Bicentennial Capitol Mall State Park (try fitting that on a T-shirt), where we learned Tennessee history, admired a massive 200-foot granite map of the state, and chatted with a lovely local woman for almost an hour. Who knew a park bench could turn into a TED Talk?

Next, we explored Marathon Village—equal parts antique oil machinery, hipster shops, and a phone booth that may or may not double as a time machine. It was weird, random, and awesome.

Then we headed to Ole Red, Blake Shelton’s bar, where we spent hours listening to live music and soaking up the Nashville vibe. Ray asked me to be his wingman and introduce him to a group of ladies at a table with two open seats. I did my job, and Ray was soon talking to one of the prettiest women there. The music was loud, but I swear I heard someone mention putting a sock on the door. 

Next stop: St. Louis, where I reunited with my longtime friend Loretta—first time in 40+ years! We reminisced, caught up on four decades of life, and then visited the Gateway Arch and the St. Louis Cathedral.

I’ve been to Notre-Dame in Paris, Sacre Coeur in Monmarte, and St. Patrick’s Cathedral in New York—but this place? Absolutely breathtaking. I genuinely had a spiritual spiritual, which is rare unless desert is involved.

We rolled into Kansas City next and checked out the Truman Library and the National WWI Museum. History? Check. Giant poppies and presidential artifacts? Double check.

After that, we drove to Salina, Kansas to see the Eisenhower Library, but it turns out they had sneakily changed their open hours—so we settled for an amazing meal at the Barolo Grill instead. Shout out to amazing meal, the kind that makes you want to write a thank you note to the chef.

Next stop was Estes Park, Colorado, where the views from our lodge made us feel like we were inside a Bob Ross painting.

Al and Ray's Excellent Adventure: The Highlights Reel #2

Highlight Reel 2: Mountains, Moose, Glaciers, and Huckleberry Dreams

Estes Park & Rocky Mountain Highs

We rolled into Estes Park, Colorado, surrounded by jaw-dropping mountain views. The next day, we explored Rocky Mountain National Park: Bear Lake, Emerald Lake, Logan Pass at 12,000 feet, and finally Grand Lake, where we lunched in style. We spotted elk, a moose, wild turkeys, and deer—a full Colorado safari!

Utah: Dino-Mite!

In Vernal, Utah, we visited the Dinosaur National Monument. The “Wall of Bones” was absolutely incredible—fossils from multiple species embedded right into the cliff. Way more impressive than I expected.

Jackson Hole & Grand Teton National Park

We enjoyed a relaxing dinner in Jackson Hole, surrounded by postcard-worthy peaks. The Grand Tetons the next day were magnificent—jagged mountains, Teton Glacier, Jenny Lake, Snake River overlook, and Oxbow Bend. Nature was showing off.

Yellowstone: Geysers and Glory

Old Faithful didn’t disappoint. The crowd “oohed” and “aahed” like it was the Fourth of July. I trekked (okay, limped) the nearly two-mile hike to the Morning Glory Pool, which was totally worth it. That surreal burst of color didn’t look real. On the way back, I caught a couple of smaller geysers erupting and got to watch Old Faithful go off again. We also saw the Grand Prismatic Spring, Gibbon Falls, and more. Yellowstone is Mother Nature at her most dramatic.

Pie in the Sky

One thing we both fell in love with? Huckleberry pie and huckleberry ice cream. I think Ray has a built-in radar for ice cream shops, he spotted them from miles away.

Seattle: Space Needles and Sea Breezes

We visited the Space Needle, Snoqualmie Falls, the Seattle waterfront, Smith Tower, and Alki Point Lighthouse. We sat by the water watching dogs, boats, and people go by on a beautiful evening.

Vancouver, BC: Lost and Found

Vancouver was stunning. Granville Island, Hope, Shannon Falls, Bridal Veil Falls (a steep hike, but worth it), Stanley Park, Lions Gate Bridge, and Prospect Point. At one point, I dropped Ray off to find a restroom… then accidentally drove out of the park and ended up back in city traffic. I called my buddy Jason to say, “I lost Ray!” He laughed so hard, he couldn’t talk for 10 minutes. I eventually made it back. Ray, of course, was calmly eating ice cream and chatting with some pretty women. The only disappointment for Ray, no Huckleberry ice cream.

We also explored the Coquihalla Canyon and its tunnels, I then took a 35-minute gondola ride up Whistler Mountain—7,000 feet up and surrounded by snow-covered peaks. Breathtaking.

A Spiritual Finish

Our final stop together was a spiritual convention in Vancouver. I saw my friend Mike from Tampa, I got to hang out withTrey and Tiffany most of Friday, and Ray and I got to hang with Kevin and Rebecca most of Saturday. It was a heartwarming way to wrap up this epic journey, held at Canada Place and BC Place Stadium. An unforgettable few days.